Gay and Transgender Issues in the Workplace

     Since writing this week’s entry, I have watched with a broken heart the reports on the terrorist attacks in Mumbai in which approximately 195 people to date have died. Beyond the death toll, the horror for our dear friends in and from India is the awareness that life will never be the same in their beloved country, any more than it could be in the United States after the terrorist attack on September 11. For we Americans, our sense of safety was forever lost. For those in India, their pride in caring well from their guests has evaporated. The terrorists sought out Americans and British citizens in Mumbai and the people of that country who were the hosts of those murdered visitors are livid and ashamed.

     I was scheduled to be in Mumbai in February of next year as the guest of Merrill Lynch. The engagement had been postponed because of the unsettled global economy, to the great regret of my Indian hosts who were so proud to be the sponsors of the first such presentation in their country. These dear souls would never forgive themselves if something happened to me while I was a guest in their country. All civilized citizens of their country are today horrified and deeply wounded by the attack on their soil and on their reputation as care-givers.

     What follows in this entry now will regrettably feel mundane to you, given what has happened in India. It does to me. But I didn’t want to print what I had written without acknowledging the horror in Mumbai and my deep concern for my friends in and from India, and I didn’t want to toss what I had written, so please understand.

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     Thank you to those of you who faithfully check in each week for this offering of thoughts on gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender issues in the workplace. I have what I hope you will ultimately decide is a treat that is not being offered to those who only read the “Are You Guys Brothers?” blog.

     My intention was to write about Harvey Milk, the man and the movie, and about the movement’s unsung heroes in the workplace, but I didn’t get the chance to see the film Milk in time, so I thought I’d share instead a recipe. I know you might be thinking “What in the heck does a recipe have to do with gay and transgender issues in the workplace?” but I figure that since I’m gay and I work out of my home, that something I wrote at home is a legitimate gay workplace issue. Work with me.

     So, there’s nothing profound being offered for your consideration this week, but if you try the recipe for this corn casserole, I think you will be very grateful that you checked out the site this week. I recently served this dish with barbeque ribs, jerk chicken, Caesar salad, and steamed broccoli. You can prepare it in advance, refrigerate overnight, and bake the next day.  It’s really good.

Brian’s Corn Casserole 

Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

Combine and mix:

1 can (15 oz.) whole kernel sweet corn drained

1 can (15 oz.) creamed corn

1 can (4.5 oz) chopped green chili

1 tsp. minced garlic

2 heaping tbs. of sour cream

Half a cup (or more) of grated Mexican cheese. (I combined Colby, Monterey Jack,   

   and Cheddar)

1 package of Taco seasoning mix

1 box of corn muffin mix

1 large bunch of chopped fresh cilantro

1 tbs. of dried chives

Dash of cayenne

1 tbs. of brown sugar (or more if desired)

2 eggs

A quarter of a cup of heavy cream

Salt and Pepper

Coat your baking dish with soft butter, pour in the blended mix and bake at 400 degrees until set (I start checking after twenty minutes but it’s closer to thirty, I think.) Don’t let it dry out. Serve warm.

Enjoy this gay dish from the workplace. Next week, we’ll add Milk.

    Last night at the dinner table, I heard from friends about being in line for coffee at Starbucks and learning at the counter that the person ahead of them had paid for their coffee. It’s called “paying it forward.” Another friend related how her father would always pay the bridge toll of the car behind him. At the grocery store, I like to donate to their food bank whatever money it says on my sales receipt that I saved on my shopping that day. So, what if at next year’s Out and Equal Conference, there’s a session in which every gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender Employee Resource Group reports in on how they paid it forward in the last year?

     Maybe they’ll say that they shared their budget with the black, Latino, Asian, or, better yet, Bible study group that couldn’t afford the speaker they wanted. Maybe they’ll say that they staffed the booth at the women’s conference, or maybe they’ll say that they picked up trash on the highway in the name of their employer, or served food in a soup kitchen, or provided water to walkers during the breast cancer fundraiser. There’s no better time for this than the present and no better strategy for success.

     The golden days of corporate diversity training on gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender issues are over. The education won’t end, nor will the commitment of gay and transgender Employee Resource Groups, but the free falling global economy will make it impossible for firms to sponsor as much training on any diversity issue, to send as many (if any) people to conferences, and to contribute as generously to gay organizations. So, we need a new approach.

     The good news is that gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender people and our corporate allies are strong, organized, and extraordinarily successful in our efforts to create a safe and productive work environment for everyone. The war for talent will continue. Companies will still seek to attract and retain the best and brightest people. Valuing diversity will continue to be the mantra for companies seeking the competitive edge. It’s just that we’re all on a tight budget now, and no one is going to like it.

     So, while times are lean, and in the spirit of the election of a black American President who values community service, now, more than ever before, do gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender employees need to volunteer their gifts and time to the communities at large. Think Peace Corp and Americorp. Who needs help in the company and who needs help in the community? Volunteerism is not new to gay and lesbian ERGs. Many, in the past, have donated time and energy to fix up housing for less fortunate people. But far more can and should be done.

     Most companies with which I work already have 100% ratings from the Human Rights Campaign. While every place stills need diversity training and lots of it, the basics are in place so that the gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender employees are free to focus on projects that will make a difference in the lives of others and make them feel good. Pay it forward.

     She was either a dour lesbian who hated men or a fundamentalist Christian who hated gay people. It turned out that she was a conservative Catholic (today that sounds repetitious) of unknown orientation. She scowled at me for an hour and a half as her 200 colleagues laughed, cried, nodded affirmation, and clapped all around her. I was speaking about gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender issues in the workplace at Eli Lilly as a man who grew up in an Irish Catholic household and was educated for sixteen years in Catholic schools, and she didn’t want me to talk about the Church.

     She was offended that I spoke of wanting to be a saint, of making up sins as a seven-year-old in Confession, of being the unanimous choice of the high school faculty for the Christian Leadership Award, of being called “the dorm Catholic” at Marquette University because I went to Mass every day, of working for a Catholic newspaper, of recently receiving a standing ovation from five hundred bishops, priests, nuns, brothers, and lay people in response to a presentation on homosexuality, and of my personal relationship with a higher power. She reminded me of the woman who said to me after a workplace presentation a few years ago, “I resent you referring to yourself as an Irish Catholic.” But I am, “Blanche.” I am. I could say that I grew up as a Polish Jew but it wouldn’t be truthful, and if there is one lesson I have learned and embraced in my life, it is to be truthful.

     It is ironic that I begin this reflection by talking about the grumpy Catholic lady with no sense of humor, as I had cautioned the company’s executives and human resource personnel not to give the crazies too much attention. For me, they’re like the drunk at the family reunion who makes everyone feel uncomfortable and who no one tells to go home and sober up. The presence of outspoken Bible-quoters in the workplace ruins it for everyone. Because many of us grew up in non-confrontative households in which peace was secured at any price, we don’t feel comfortable telling the obnoxious troublemaker to be quiet or work elsewhere. Gratefully, that is beginning to change.

     As corporate executives become more adept at distinguishing between religion and religious beliefs, they are more able and likely to respond to those who protest on religious grounds the company’s support for gay and transgender people with a clear message of  “Join the team or join the ranks of the unemployed.”

     The truth be told, the loud-mouth Bible quoters in the workplace are an embarrassment to the overwhelming majority of people who identify themselves as Christian. One such person recently spoke out by saying “A bigot is a bigot regardless of whether they wrap their biases in the Bible.” As we all know, the Ku Klux Klan uses the burning cross, the symbol of Christ’s death, as a sign of their hatred for blacks, Jews, and homosexuals. But they too are an embarrassment to the overwhelming majority of Southern white Christians.

     Despite being warned of how conservative Indianapolis would be, my experience at Eli Lilly was extraordinarily rewarding. The senior executives were very affirming of my message and eager to learn how they could help bridge the gap between their corporate policies and their corporate culture. The session I had in which I avoided looking at the grumpy, humorless, Catholic woman, was telecast to two other auditoriums and is available to 40,000 Lilly employees worldwide. These allegedly conservative Midwesterners, who voted Democrat (by the slimmest of margins) for the first time since 1964, gave me a long standing ovation.

     The more that the silent majority of employees are given proof that senior management supports them, and the more education they are given on gay and transgender issues, the more likely it is that they will start speaking up to the trouble-makers in the workplace, taking back control of the company by those who embrace the concept of valuing diversity.

     “What seems very strange to me,” declared the banking executive during the role-play feedback session, “is the impression given here that ‘gay’ trumps ‘religious views.’ There’s something wrong with that.”

     The workshop scenario that prompted his remark involved a boss, Al, with conservative religious views who couldn’t bring himself to attend an event in which his highly-productive lesbian worker, Corrine, was being honored for her civic activities by a group working with gay youth. In any other situation, the boss would be expected to attend the session to show the company’s support of the employee.

     “I’m sorry that I can’t stay for your part of the workshop,” the man told me during the break before I spoke. “I have business I need to address.”

     “I wish you could stay,” I said. “Most people find my presentation really helpful, but if you must leave I want to address I statement you made during the last discussion. You said that ‘gay’ doesn’t trump ‘religious views.’ But in the opinion of your Executive Committee, gay workplace issues do trump religious views. So do race issues, women’s issues, and every other category of diversity.”

     “I don’t believe that,” he said. “It would be a violation of the Constitution.”

     “No,” I replied, “it would be a violation of the Constitution and of your company’s policies if I had said that ‘gay’ trumps ‘religion.’ A person’s religion is protected against discrimination in the workplace. You can’t be denied a job or a promotion because you are a Muslim, Jew, Catholic, or atheist, just as you can’t be denied a job or a promotion because you’re gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender, but neither the Constitution nor your company’s policies allow employees to impose their religious beliefs on their colleagues at work. Those beliefs are trumped by the rights of a gay person, a woman, a person of color, or a person with a disability to work in a safe environment in which they feel fully valued. Al’s views of Corrine’s private behavior have nothing to do with work. He should be expected to support her in the same measure as he would if a heterosexual employee was being honored for volunteer work with senior citizens. Gay trumps religious views.”

     When Merrill Lynch brought me to
Singapore at the beginning of 2008 to work with their senior managers there, some people questioned how a company would dare challenge national law with their diversity policies. Singapore prohibits same-sex behavior. But providing training on valuing the diversity represented by gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender people doesn’t violate any laws; not in Singapore and not in any of the U.S. states in which I did training before same-sex love-making was legal. Such laws and such religious beliefs are about behavior, a topic on which the corporation takes no legal stand. The corporations with non-discrimination policies that protect gay and transgender people are prohibiting discrimination based upon their orientation and their identity.

     It is a person’s status as gay, as Muslim, as Catholic, and as a Jew that is protected. Their behavior outside the company, unless it is a source of public embarrassment to the company, is irrelevant. Thus, it doesn’t matter to the company if gay people in Singapore choose to have sex, as long as they don’t do it in the workplace. Likewise, it doesn’t matter to the company if the Muslim prays five times a day, the Catholic goes to Confession, or the Jew keeps holy the Sabbath. They won’t lose their protections against discrimination at work because of their private behaviors. But, they will lose their jobs if they create an unwelcoming environment by trying to impose their personal beliefs on their colleagues at work.

     Increasingly, corporate CEOs are stating very clearly: If you don’t like our policies, go work elsewhere. The CEO of BP in America recently said so in response to repeated incidents of Gay Awareness posters being defaced in a particular location. Such harassing behavior will not be tolerated, he said. If caught, you will be fired.

     But, don’t gay people and conservative religious people both have to compromise on their rights a little in order for everyone to feel safe and valued at work? NO. Gay people should not refrain from organizing at work, talking about their spouses or partners, displaying pictures of loved ones, bringing significant others to company social functions, speaking up on the subject at staff meetings, joining office athletic teams, or from any other activity in which their heterosexual peers are allowed to engage. If religious conservatives are offended by these behaviors, or by having women bosses, or the sight of yarmulkes, or the time given off to people of other faiths, they should consider other work, perhaps for an organization that is owned and operated by their church.

     But what about the company’s goal of making people with conservative religious views feel valued? Don’t you risk losing your ability to attract and retain some of the best and brightest people who are conservative in their religious beliefs and offending that segment of the buying public that is conservative in their religious views? Aren’t there more people with conservative religious views than there are gay people? It feels as if it would be financial suicide to support gay people over religious conservatives.

     If that’s what you were doing, it would be foolish. The company does want its employees who have conservative religious viewpoints to feel safe and valued. It therefore promises them that they won’t be discriminated against because of their identification or status of being a religious conservative. The company wants to create an environment in which the religious conservative feels an incentive to help the company attract the talent and the loyalty of other people who are conservative in their religious views. But not if the price is violating its own values and losing credibility with every other employee and member of the buying public.

     If numbers are important, there are certainly more religious conservatives in the world than there are gay men and women, but probably not more than gay men and women, all of their family members and friends, and all of the people who are committed to issues of social justice (as many religious conservatives are themselves.)

     So, everyone is encouraged to believe what they want to believe, vote the way they want to vote, socialize with the people with whom they wish to socialize, worship where they wish to worship, share a life with whomever they wish to share a life, and while in the employment of the company, to embrace its principles, to value all forms of diversity, to check their biases at the door, to work hard, to proactively create teamwork, and, if they are managers, to support the efforts of their employees to involve themselves in the community. Al should support Corrine by witnessing her receiving an award at the gay community event. “Gay” trumps “religious views” in the workplace.